The Times They are A’Changin

Until today, I never really sat down to think about how the world evolved into what it is now, from what it was back when I was a kid, as far back as I can remember.  I was flipping through the TV channels today, unable to find anything worth watching, when I reached Nickelodeon and was curious to see what was on as I literally grew up watching the channel every day.  I found that as I watched, I grew more and more agitated that Nickelodeon, the channel that I grew up watching .  Anyway, I have a point, and that is this: as you walk around living your life, day after day, you never really notice big changes in society because: a big change is nothing more than a series of small changes that occur over a prolonged period of time so as to gradually ease you into the changes.

I will start with an example.  The show Rocko’s Modern Life was on Nickelodeon in the mid nineties.  There was a character on that show named Really Really Big Man.  One of Really Really Big Man’s powers was he had the ability to shoot his nipples off of his body, they would then attach themselves to his target’s eyes to show them the future.  I don’t care who you are, you can’t tell me that someone saying, “Gaze into my nipples of the future” then shooting his nipples at your eyes isn’t the most fucked up hilarious thing ever.  You know that in kids programming these days you would never see anything even remotely as edgy as that.  Hell, you’d be lucky to see a childrens program that even acknowledged that nipples even existed.  It’s hard to deny that the kids shows of my generation were the best ever.  They were so integral in our lives that we look back to them as one of the best parts of our childhoods.  Simply mention the shows, “Ren & Stimpy, Ahhh! Real Monsters, Doug, Salute Your Shorts, The Angry Beavers, CatDog” you will defiantly hear about them.  The only thing we can say about the cartoons of today is how much we can’t stand how stupidly dull and not funny they are (except for Spongebob haha).

The whole point is within my lifetime, a fairly short 20 years, I look back and it is very easy to see how much society has changed since the mid-nineties.  I wouldn’t say it’s a good change but at the same time it’s hard to say whether or not the change will be bad.  All I know is the kids watching what’s on Nickelodeon today won’t feel the same way about their childhood shows that my generation did and still does to this day.

Politicians: Exactly how much shit are they full of?

Politician: a leader engaged in civil administration.

That’s a pretty accurate definition of what a politician is.  They’re leaders who are engaged in civil administration.  Leaders, however, are not required to be good at leading.  The next time you’re with a group of friends, tell them to follow you somewhere, anywhere… make up any reason you want.  If they listen to you and follow you that makes you a leader.  However, the people who are following you will probably think you’re an asshole when they find out that you weren’t going anywhere and you had no reason to go there.  You have just done something that politicians are really good at… convincing people to follow them.  Also, just like a politician, you’ve succeeded in making no progress what-so-ever and wasting everyone’s time, which not only makes you a bad leader… it also makes you an asshole (and that’s not the only correct judgement of you you’re “friends” make when talking about you behind your back either).

All politicians are assholes.  Now, just because that sounds like an “unfair generalization” doesn’t mean that it is one.  The vast majority of Americans belong to either the lower class, working class, or the lower to upper middle class.  The politicians that represent them don’t belong to any of those classes.  The upper class is reserved for the mere 1% of Americans who act as the “grand conceptulizers,” those who have great influence over the nations institutions.  Politicians would fall in that category.  It doesn’t matter how much money they make or how much they’re worth.  The mere fact that they are politicians puts them in the upper class.

The upper class is the one that likes to be viewed as not only above everyone else, but separated from everyone else.  We’re like the psychologically disturbed family member who makes everyone feel uncomfortable at Thanksgiving dinner but they keep shoveling turkey on our plate praying that the Tryptophan in the turkey meat will put us in a coma.  At least then we could still be in the family and no one would have to deal with our tediously repetitive yet lawfully acceptable outbursts where we tell them how much we don’t approve of them.  The only difference between that situation and this situation is that we’re not in a coma and we’re forced to suffer through the endless supply of bull shit while our vocal displays of disapproval fall on deaf ears.

The most annoying thing about politicians is that they pretend to care about our problems when they really don’t give a shit.  It’s easy to pretend to give a shit when you’re so full of shit.  It’s gotten out of control.  This is the only country on Earth where a candidate can run for president and win their parties nomination based solely on the platform of change…..

………

……. still waiting…..

Oh, that’s it?  See, cuz I kinda thought I would be told not just what needs to be changed, but how exactly it’s going to be changed.  The idea of “change” is abstract, therefore, not a single fucking person knows what it means.  I don’t care how much you think you know what it means, you don’t.  The idea of change is no more or less abstract then the idea of love, luck, hate, etc.  No candidate would ever be taken seriously if they ran for president under the idea of bringing love to everyone.  What kind of love is it?  You don’t know either, that could be because the word love has no concrete meaning.  Maybe he’s bringing the love of shaking babies, or autoerotic asphyxiation to Americas’ Executive branch.  God knows the Legislative branch has the largest concentration of people who jerk off with belts around their necks… maybe it takes the edge off… sitting around saying “yea” and “nay” all day must be exhausting.

The supporters of that candidate are completely incapable of understanding this but I will tell you what’s going to change if that person gets elected.  Absolutly fucking nothing.  Terrorists are still going to hate us and try to kill us, the KKK will continue to be ignorant racists, gas prices will continue to go up along with the prices of back-alley blow jobs, crime and drugs will continue to rule the inner cities, and the population of fat people in America will continue to have greater numbers then the total population of America itself (special thanks to Little Britain USA).  I should add that his opposition won’t fix any of those problems either, but keep in mind, he never really promised his supporters that things would “change” should he be elected.

The only thing they want is power.  Power is a very valuable thing… it’s even more valuable then money and respect (which politicians certainly don’t deserve).  The most powerful man in America is the president.  The most powerful nation on Earth is America.  Therefore, the President of the United States is the most powerful man in the world, but, that doesn’t mean anyone likes him.

I feel more comfortable supporting the guy from the Dos Equis commercials.  He may not be the most powerful man in the world, but he’s definately the most interesting man in the world.

There’s no “me” in team

Wow, first post on WordPress.  I’m used to LiveJournal but I decided not to be a bitch anymore and get this. I never noticed this before but it’s pretty interesting how both WordPress and LiveJournal are comprised of two words that have no spaces in between them but the first letter of each word is capitalized.  Coincidence?  Very curious…

It’s pretty cool I guess.  If you want to read my old blog CLICK HERE.  Doesn’t really matter I guess since no one will read this anyway.  I mean I’ll try to have people read it but, I mean honestly, I don’t think many people will.

But anyway, for those of you who ARE reading it….

I’m going to assume that we’ve all heard the tired cliche, “There’s no “me” in team.”  Let’s de-construct that phrase, shall we?

I suppose that technically there is “me” in team, in the literal sense.  There is an “m” and an “e.”  They’re not in an order that spells “me” but they’re in there so I guess one could say that there is me in team.  You know what I say to them… FUCK YOU YOU’RE WRONG.

Others say, “There’s no “I” in team.”

That’s indisputable.  Spell “team,” T.E.A.M.  I don’t see a fucking “I.”

In conclusion:

There’s no “me” in team.  Nor is there an “I” in team.  That’s why it’s a team.  A TEAM: a number of persons associated in one joint action.  Some people in teams like to act like they’re not in a team.  But they’re wrong, you’re in a fucking team asshole.  The only way those phrases could be changed would be to either say, “‘I’ am not in a Team,” or “The Team does not have ‘me’ in it.”  If either of those two phrases applies to you, you’re a loser.  If you’re one of those people who are in a team but don’t act like it, you’re an asshole.